Fruit of the Month Club for Life!

This is the time of year when I really feel the need to share my salvation testimony.  I don't know why but here it is? 

I started attending church at the young age of four, not with my parents but alone.  We lived in Hawaii and every Sunday my mom and I would go to the store to buy doughnuts and on the way we would pass a church.  One day I asked her what it that and she said that's a church.  I responded I want to go to church,  I don't know why since I wasn't living in a christian household and never went to church before.  Maybe it was because everyone looked so pretty in there Sunday clothes who knows why I just knew I wanted to go.  So for weeks I would say I want to go to church until finally my mom stopped in front of the church and said 'fine then go' and she reached across the bench seat and opened the car door.  And I think much to her surprise I got out and thanked her and walked up the walkway into church.  She was right there waiting for me when church ended.  I don't know if she left and came back or sat there the whole time waiting.  Now I know some of you will be skeptical about the story but I should explain I was attending Kindergarten one block away from this church and walked to school everyday so for me the thought of walking home didn't bother me so I wasn't afraid to be left there and I really wanted to go. And I attend this church regularly until we moved when I was in third grade.
To make a long story shorter I was always looking to go to church and asking to go with people.  And that brings me to my Salvation part of the story.  When I was 10 years old we moved to Widefield CO a suburb just outside of Colorado Springs.  I remember asking a girl if she went to church and if I could come with her and she said yes; but she took the church bus so I would have to walk to her house.  Alright I could do that so the next Sunday I walked to her house.  I got there just as the bus was pulling away but she was looking for me and saw me running.  She must have asked the bus driver to stop, so I was able to get on and go to church.  After church when the bus was dropping us off at her house the bus driver asked where I lived and said he would take me to my house.  When he dropped me at my house he asked if I would like to come next week and I said yes.  And so I started attending Emmanuel Baptist Church regularly and it was the first time I ever heard the salvation message.  I just figured Jesus loved me so it was all good.  I didn't know I had to accept him and ask him to save me from my sin.  And I really wanted to but you see when you are a bus kid in this church you weren't allowed in the church service you went to Sunday school and once a month a youth service then the bus took you home you didn't mingle with the "real" church members.  But if you got saved you had to take a later bus and walk the aisle during the invitation and stand in front of everyone and say you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.  Uh no thank-you I think I'll pass. 
But then something happened to my mom, you see she got really sick and was put into the hospital.  I was 11 then and you had to be 13 to get into the intensive care unit so I didn't get to see her for a month.  During that time a lot of stuff was going on that scared me, my dad's mom and sister flew in and wanted to take me home with them; just me, not me and my brother.  This made me think they all thought my mom was going to die and I would be in the way.  My dad decided to not send me away with them, he would keep us all together.  Finally the doctors diagnosed her to have a brain aneurysm and would have to do surgery right away. Now this was in 1971 brain surgery was not common and living through it was 50-50 at best that's what my dad said as he drove us the two hours to the hospital in Denver where she was.  We were basically saying goodbye just in case.  Now I am crying as I write this as it is hard to explain the emotion a 11 year old felt and still feels thinking about losing your mother who you haven't seen in a month and wouldn't be able to see maybe ever again.  That's right they still wouldn't let me in to see her, hospital rules can sometimes be very cruel.  Well all I remember is that night I laid in my bed crying and I said  "Jesus please if you make my mommy better I will walk the big church aisle and get saved just save my mommy.  I am to young to not have a mommy.  Please help me."
The next day my dad came home and said they cancelled the surgery.  When the doctor did the finally CAT Scan before the operation they found the bleeding had stopped and the blood was completely drained from her brain and that they were keeping her for one more day then they were sending her home.  The very next Sunday I walked the aisle in the big church and accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.
yay fruit, but the second month you are a little surprised and think wow that was kind of cool, by the six and seventh month when  you are still getting the unexpected gift it is like wow super cool.  Now the greatest gift in all the World in Jesus so when you accept that gift you are like wow how cool. But it too is the gift that keeps on giving, you see after my mom came home it took her awhile till she could really remember things and one day she was asking me about church and I told her my salvation story and she told me what happen to her the morning of her Cat scan.  The nurse took her into the shower and told her that they weren't sure when she would be able to shower next because of the surgery.  She turned the water on and left my mom to wash herself.  As the water heated up my mom started to feel faint and thought she was going to pass out when a man grabbed her arm and eased her onto the floor and pushed the call button.  He looked at me mom and told her you are going to be okay now don't worry and then he walked out.  Now this was 1971 in a women's wing, there were any male nurses back then at least so my mom tells me.  Then she said I am sure it was your Jesus.  About two month later both she and my dad accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior.  Unexpected fruit came Wow super cool, and then my husband got saved WOW and then my kids, and my husband's family and friends and so on and so on.  You see this is the ultimate fruit of the month club because you get fruit for life!!  And the best part about it is that the fruit never rots it last for eternity!  Both my parents have gone on to heaven now but because of Jesus I will see them again and that is just another gift in my future waiting for me.  God is good and at Christmas time I want to remember His Goodness toward me.

Evaluating Ones Situation in Life

Last Friday I received a call from my doctor's nurse letting me know that I had to come in for a biopsy because there had been some changes since my last mammogram.  Alrighty no problem I said.  She made it seem so easy I didn't have to fast and would be able to drive myself home after.  No operating room just the ultrasound room, which I had been in already.  Oh wow I thought modern medicine is so cool a biopsy without surgery.  Then she said 'we'll numb the area before we remove some tissue samples.  It will probably take 2 hours since we have to get samples from both sides'  Okay uh what did she say numb the area,  I thought I best do some research so I did and what I found out was not good.  I am awake sitting up while they are poking me all around with needles!  I guess a little panic set in. 
By now you are probably thinking that I am writing this blog because of this situation but not so.  This situation just caused me to re-evaluate some areas in my life.  You see I have lived here in South Florida coming up on 8 years, and I have been attending the same church for about 3 years so when this situation occurred I immediately picked up the phone and called....no one.  I tried to think of someone I was close enough to to ask to come, since my husband was going to be out of town.  Someone that I thought really cared about me, not an acquaintance or someone I was friendly with at church, but someone who had reached out to me in friendship.  My mom used to tell me if I showed myself friendly I would have friends.  So every time we moved I would do just that, I had friends in California and Texas but for whatever reason I don't seem to have any here.  Now if you are reading this and are hurt by my words I am sorry but I ask you to ask yourself have you shown yourself friendly towards me; have you had me over or invited me to join you for lunch or anything?  I have people over for lunch and dinners often I have tried to get to know them and they seem to like me just fine. I am showing them my friendly without any expectations.  I hear of them getting together with others and going out with others but I never seem to make the invite list which is fine I hold no grudge.  But when this situation came up because of the lack of friendliness shown toward me I didn't feel as if I could call anyone. 
And this is the point of the blog evaluating ones situation in life.  God is in control of all things I let go of and I try to let go of everything that way I can have true joy knowing that whatever happens it is what He wanted to happen.  But I am questioning this,  Does God really want me to be alone through this? Well no He got it so my husband could re-arrange his trip and get back in time to go with me.  And even though I don't necessary have girlfriends here I do have them else where and they called to check up on me.  And I am a bit depressed but hanging in there, I am scared about the biopsy, not what they might find, but mostly depressed to think that in 8 years there isn't one person I could call not one person to say hey let's do lunch or come over for coffee.  But this too will pass once I get through the next couple weeks I probably will just resign myself to this is what God wants me to have and believe you me I have a lot, a husband who loves me after 31 years, two wonderful Children and two great children in laws, two beautiful grandchildren and one on the way  really all this whining is just because I am a bit depressed and very scared.  ah suck it up that's all I can tell myself!